The Wingtip Passing Over

I could have watched 'Up in the Air' but someone would not let me so. Sentimental and award winning sort of movies always excite me better than feasting on Korean food. I used to dream about gathering with all the people I adore who are either faraway or forever busy and feasting on Korean royal delicacies like those in the drama series 'Dae Jang Geum'. You must be amazed at the fact that I'm pretty good at fooling with fantasies. Can't help it. I don't watch porn so I need to exercise the thinking skills.

Talk about crapping. I'm supposed to just share a quote with you before I head off to bed. The main character Ryan Bingham says this in a voice-over when he observes an airplane taking off, letting off his luggage:

'Tonight most people will be welcomed home by jumping dogs and squealing kids. Their spouses will ask about their day. Tonight they'll sleep. The stars will wheel forth from their daytime hiding places, and one of those lights, slightly brighter than the rest, will be my wingtip passing over.'

I always tell people 'youth' is my asset. Being young means I won't have to worry about longing for companionship at the moment. But I just can't deny there is this fear of being lonely when everyone else will be happily struggling with commitments while I'll very likely still wonder if permanence comes with commitments. Do I even have a choice?

Somehow, it saddens me to see the old folks' face glowing when they talk about my nieces and nephews.

I Was

They told me I've lost the 'coolness' upon laughing at the way I ran after the basketball. I thought that's good news. I meet these people once in a blue moon to remind myself of who I was. People change but it's a matter of for the good or worse. When I was 'cool' back then, I thought I was very good. I didn't mind fighting with people of authority and experience because I watched too much of American reality shows. As if 'personality' sells. Duh. What makes you shine is how hard you work and having good contacts. So today I bow when I have to. I yell at idiots when I need to. Glad to learn that I've grown so much emotionally. There is no longer this void that constantly yearns to be filled. Please, I want year 2011 to be an awesome one. Expecting abundance of fun and humble achievements. And to keep in tighter contact with friends.

Thanks, old folks, for giving me the world. =)

'There are always flowers for those who want to see them.' Henry Matisse

I'm effing bored, aight?!

Sometimes all you want is to be left alone. To defend yourself looks more like you're covering up a certain ugly truth. So why not just shut up and watch the show, no? Some fuglymoronicauntie keeps stalking me on Twitter and thinks whatever I bitch there has to do with her pathetic life. Darn. What's with people these days? And I thought I'm stupid enough to even have a blog here.

I'm holidaying yet again. If there's one reason I hate the holidays it's because all the nonsense starts eating up my head and I'll start making up dramas for myself. What kind of dramas you're wondering? Even fighting with my beloved sister over the menu in a seafood restaurant counts, for goodness sake! Yes, I'm this childish, mind you~ You see, me and the family are for sambal sotong but the little bitch just won't let her taste buds flirt with spicy dishes. Damn I love democracy because the evil majority wins and I was amused to watch her sobbing. Hahaha! That's why I enjoy going to the theatres sometimes to watch others' misery. Blek.

Oh yes, about democracy. Talked to a stranger on MSN once about the democratic system being the reason of destruction of justice in our beloved Bolehland. I have no statistics or quotations from relevant sources to support this argument but you just gotta sit back, relax and let the bitch here do the simple lecture. Democracy is for a society that is intellectually developed enough. Bolehland is too segregated to agree on a same direction. You have one group of apes that yell for special treatment, rights and privileges and another pack of dogs that is for meritocracy. The truth is all these are happening because we get to vote for what we like. When these people are voted into the legislative chamber, they can't get into an agreement which pleases all of us. While they say the majority which consists of the apes are fairly happy with the economical policy which favours them, a distinctive large portion of the people, the dogs are uber fuming all the time. We won't be surprised if something like the May 13 tragedy will repeat some day. So this friend of mine suggested we need someone like Lee Kuan Yew to right all these ridiculous wrongs. Sadly, the closest person to be as powerful as LKY was our honorable Tun M. Enough said about Tun M. We all know how his political ideology is beneficial for mostly the apes and many of the projects introduced during his time are killing us by present. Oh boy. We need a LKY desperately because no matter how fairly the electoral system is going to be conducted, Bolehland will still go down to drain with all the social encumbrances. :(

Shit. I haven't written anything about politics for so darn long!!

Exploitation

It's fucking when one exploits you.

But come to think of it; I'm so amazing people just have to know more about me. So spread the words and I'll get the attention. Thank you, bitch. You're so cheap may you and your mum burn in hell. I can do the same thing to you. I mean it's all about manipulating rumours and spreading them to the right people and getting your desired outcome. But I won't. Coz I'm a bitch with ethics.

Oh yes, I'm living a good life. There're great friends and loving family behind my back. Don't be jealous. By the way, bystanders can fuck your own business. It doesn't make you any less a teenage drama queen to play mediating here. Duh.

What?!!!!

The crazy lil sister texted me a message using the old man's cell phone.

W: U back Saturday?

Me: Yea, of course. Tell Mimi I got the Excellent Student Award from the law firm.

W: Oh. Is it new student...it's a gal or boy?

Me: What? I said I received an award. I attended an interview two weeks ago, remember?

W: Boy or girl?

Me: What?! I don't understand you laaaaa...

W: Oh sorry. Mimi say gong xi.

What the fuck they teach the kids in the school these days? She can't even understand simple English~~~~

To Annoy For the Rest of Your Life

I took the 21st Century Vitamin C tablet instead of the other ones mum gave me before I left for the School. At this age, I am impliedly given the liberty to make choices and do things without the parents' acknowledgement. But one thing that doesn't change is the constant nagging from the two aging figures. They used to look so tall and strong. Now they are a mixture of wisdom and foolishness to me. They tell me the things I didn't know like life is a bitch and friends are mere fragile human beings. They believe in ridiculous things I don't agree.

I once thought they are the most boring married couple on Earth. No sweet talks, no hugging. In fact, bad temper thrown at each other sometimes. Pop culture and either classic or contemporary literature brand 'romance' with kisses, passionate love making, chocolates, flowers and cards . Sad for the most of us, romance is wasteful. At least '500 Days of Summer' agrees too. Just when you thought romance is materially-related, you gotta observe an old couple holding hands in a park and redefine 'romance'.

Dude, it isn't fake. It's just different from whatever crapful belief you used to cultivate. Coz I find my parents interestingly romantic. He would slap her tummy saying, 'You look like rice dumpling with juicy pork!' and she would hit his back calling him 'Shitty old man!' and then they would laugh at each other's aging body. He worked real hard to give her the luxury today. She went through the bad days with him when they were dating. It was for quite a while, a long-distance-relationship; with no instant messages, e-mails and cell phones like what we have by present. He wrote her a love letter just once. Yes, just once. I'm proud to tell you they're married for 25 years. It started with a wedding dinner of not more than 8 tables. And I hope it will last till their last breath on Earth.

As I said goodbye, I looked at the two with mixed feelings. How I wish I can take someone back home for dinner with them one day and tell them, 'Hey, old folks. I found someone equally stupidly romantic as you two!' ... ...

I drove. I unpacked. I cleaned the damn room and rearranged the furniture for some feng shui goodness. Here I am back at the School with a hope for great things. :)

[I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. ~Rita Rudner]

Bark bark bark

This is my domain you're stepping into. They say there is too much of darkness and that it needs to shed a little light. Being gloomy attracts nothing but bitterness. Didn't want my readers to go mellow after reading these words of mine so I took quite some time off to explore the other side of me; the one who used to laugh like a clown and make jokes out of every stupidity.

There were pieces of crap thrown right in my face when I found myself lost in search of those memorised statutes and terms during the finals examination but the tiring preparation proved to be fruitful. The results were satisfying although not good enough. I know for certainty I'm good but for most of the time I keep the cool and stay average. Why rush when things are good enough at the moment? Not sufficiently ambitious if I don't stop by the library everyday and make full use of the free time to read up law notes? Don't want to be a git who doesn't appreciate life. (This is merely a reassurance that I was utilising my limited capacity in absorbing the legal knowledge in classes quite well...)

Thank Gaga for the holidays friends are getting back into my life. Movies, theatre, mamak meals, shopping and pillow talks make me feel humane once again. They always say I'm the busiest person they have ever known. Laughed my ass out, idiots. I spend my time loitering at home and driving around the hometown for leisure instead of meeting up with the boring faces too often. Ngek ngek. Call me an asshole but I find gatherings should be as less frequent as possible. And besides. those whom I genuinely feel like visitting are always faraway, busy or perhaps just-not-there-for-me. Hmm.

And also the parents and sister. It's amazing how the old folks never fail to treat you like you're still 5. At least this keeps me from trouble like getting a girl pregnant (*cough*) or being involved with drugs. See, you don't need a religion to teach you these after all. :P The sister has finally learnt new English words and finds herself so much more comfortable conversing in English. Awww. Glad that the la la part of her is dying.

Good day, people. Good day. Although I'm currently stuck in a law firm doing this ridiculous attachment as part of the requirement so I can leave for the UK next September. Can't wait. The other side of the world is waiting for this bitch. ~Bark~